Wednesday, 10 July 2013

Keep Psalm and Carry On...

We had a wonderful guest preacher on Sunday, in the person of Maya Brathwaite – so it seems that folks have been reluctant to query a guest.
However, I did get a couple of requests for my interpretation of Psalm 30 and had a brief conversation about why we bother with Psalms in church at all.
Why bother?
For several reasons, I imagine – not the least of which is that it keeps us connected to our tradition.  A tradition nurtured and maintained in our United Church, but reaching back and connecting us to the Methodist Church, the Roman Catholic Church, the Orthodox Church, the first Christian Communities, the Jews and the Hebrew Scriptures – pretty good company and not folks that you want to leave behind.
Another, perhaps more persuasive reason, is that the psalms know us.  Yes, the language is often arcane and the metaphors can be trying…  the sentiments are not always agreeable, as we can  be exhorted to “wreak vengeance on the nations” or “bathe our feet in the blood of the wicked”  (149:7; 58:10)… and it can be downright confusing…
God has taken his place in the divine council;
in the midst of the gods he holds judgment:
 "How long will you judge unjustly
and show partiality to the wicked?
(82:1,2)

Love the call for justice, confused about who might be attending this meeting… are not monotheists?

However, this is only problematical if you imagine reading the Psalms (or any scripture) as if it was meant to be history or instruction.  If you read the Psalms as poetry or expression of humanity, then it is less of a problem.  From time to time, I have wished horrible vengeance on my enemies… and if God is going to know me, God needs to know that I lose my temper, my decorum and my perspective from time to time.  I also create false gods for myself as well as I find myself worshipping status or wealth, sacrificing my family or my openness to God in order to look good, make a buck or protect myself from others.     Every now and again, it helps to imagine God sitting down and talking to my other “gods” and saying to them, “Look, god of money, I know that Norm has been spending time with you lately, but don’t think that that means he’s giving up on caring about others or that he’s going to really judge himself better because he has more money…. And god of celebrity, sit down and don’t forget that what people think is not nearly as important as what I think…   and god of doing whatever I want just because I want to – grow up!”  In that little drama, I am reminded about what’s important to me and how my actions need to follow my values…    but come on, who doesn’t have a few extra gods wandering around, calling meetings?   The Psalms get that.

The Psalms know who I am… winner, loser, victor vanquished… lover, fighter… faithful, struggling… seeing God in everything all around me… wondering why God has turned away…   Singing to God a new song every day, or slowly walking through the valley of the shadow of death. 

I think that we keep the Psalms because they reminds us of who we are and that God understands… as God puts images of justice in our minds and we put words in God’s mouth… the Psalms bring us together.

At least that’s my thinking today…
As for the other request:  Psalm 30, as it is included in the New Revised Standard Version of the Bible, and then as I imagine it.

Psalm 30
A Psalm. A Song at the dedication of the temple. Of David.
1I will extol you, O Lord, for you have drawn me up,
   and did not let my foes rejoice over me.
2O Lord my God, I cried to you for help,
   and you have healed me.
3O Lord, you brought up my soul from Sheol,
   restored me to life from among those gone down to the Pit.*

4Sing praises to the Lord, O you his faithful ones,
   and give thanks to his holy name.
5For his anger is but for a moment;
   his favour is for a lifetime.
Weeping may linger for the night,
   but joy comes with the morning.

6As for me, I said in my prosperity,
   ‘I shall never be moved.’
7By your favour, O Lord,
   you had established me as a strong mountain;
you hid your face;
   I was dismayed.

8To you, O Lord, I cried,
   and to the Lord I made supplication:
9‘What profit is there in my death,
   if I go down to the Pit?
Will the dust praise you?
   Will it tell of your faithfulness?
10Hear, O Lord, and be gracious to me!
   O Lord, be my helper!’

11You have turned my mourning into dancing;
   you have taken off my sackcloth
   and clothed me with joy,
12so that my soul* may praise you and not be silent.
   O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you for ever.




Psalm 30… my way.

I’m more than half way through my life, God… (well, unless I live a very, very long time)
I think that I’m finally getting some perspective…  and I laugh at myself.
When I was younger, it was tough… people got in my way, tried to crush my dreams, put me in boxes and categories that didn’t fit… but I often felt that you held them off for me – held them off, so that I could be me.
And I became ME… with capital letters.
I worked tirelessly to achieve… I studied, practiced, innovated…. Had my shoulder to the plow and my eye always on the prize.
While others may have shirked or rested… while they may have been satisfied with a Participants Ribbon, I pushed myself to win… overcome… take the prize.

And I knew that you were always in the stands cheering me on.

When I finally made it… I really made it!!  Top of my class, best house on the street, best neighbourhood… I had reputation, security, satisfaction and everybody loved me… but nobody loved me more than YOU loved me.
I always figured that you loved me more because I tried so much harder…. I was your favourite because I earned it… with dedication, wit and, I don’t know… brilliance??
I rested and congratulated myself on a race well run… I was set for life… a self-made success.

And then it happened…
Cracks began to show
Things began to crumble
The bottom fell out
In short order, it all went sour… and I lost all that I had worked for… all that I had earned and deserved!
I looked around and realized that you were no longer in the stands cheering me on… In FACT, it felt like you were angry with me… maybe, even jealous?
How else could I explain everything falling apart… you were out to get me.

I remember my childhood prayers:  “Now, I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep…”  And I cried… I actually cried… “Please God, keep my soul…. Don’t be angry at me for my arrogance… I get it… don’t damn me… keep me alive and I will preach… I will praise… I will tell everyone of your goodness and mercy… (even in my tears, I still imagined that you needed my praise… and that others might care what I had to say)

And then… in my losing everything, I discovered how much I actually had.
In my vulnerability, I found your love…
As dark as things may have been… I realized that just as dawn follows night, so, too does life follow cycles… and nothing stays the same… not fortune, not misfortune…
And in acceptance of my life as it is… and I have found such joy, peace, wisdom…   Serenity… and You.

Hallelujah!!!


Amen.

1 comment: